#1
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Personal Issues
Well guys here we go again...another life story about someone who none of you personally know and dont really care to know about..but I'd thought I would share anyway...
So lately I havent been on Wckediden much..and Im sure some of you have noticed... So this is whats going on...I have been dealing with a lot of things at home...I just recently went back to college and my time at home has been very hard because of it...my husband and I have been having a lot of problems lately because its hard for me to keep up with school,my duties at home, and taking care of my 3 year old son...so basically I feel like I dont have his support because instead of encouraging me to finish school I feel like hes trying to make me quit because he feels that Im not keeping up with my responsibilities... So I feel as if its just a matter of time before i explode and give him a piece of my mind..which i dont want to do because I can get very angry and let my anger take over my mind...and we all know angry decisions are the ones you always regret...and just FYI we are not having any type of financial issues or anything of that sort..this is simply relationship problems who I think everybody goes thru... But its coming to the point where it does make me cry myself to sleep at times..and I dont think my son should be around that type of environment..so what I decided to do is cut back on my free time..which is when i escape to Wckediden and just forget about everything else... Im gonna dedicate a little more time to my home and my family who i think really needs me right now......Dont get me wrong i'll be jumping in every once in a while but it wont be as often as it used to...OH and another thing..to all of you that have my cell number..my 2 year contract just ended yesterday and I didnt want to renew it just yet because Im gonna be adding 2 more lines maybe by this weekend..so yeah my phone wont be activated till then... :( So yeah thats pretty much the drama right now....oh and umm i do get a chance to check my email at school every morning so if any of yall would like to write to me you can reach me at deysi_pineda@hotmail.com :) feel free to just say hi if you want :) well thanks to all of you for all the help and support you guys have given me since day 1...this is not a good bye..since i'll be around..but i just really appreciate all of you guys do for me..you guys are seriously the best... my best wishes and blessings to all of you... hugs and kisses - Daisy |
The Following 20 Users Say Thank You to littledaisy For This Useful Post: | ||
#2
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Re: Personal Issues
good luck with everything Daisy, just stay strong and keep your head up, he will come around..... us guys sometimes just get a little intimidated by independent woman, thats all. he will get over it, lol. but whatever you do stay in colledge and get your degree girl!
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#3
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#4
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Re: Personal Issues
Daisy,
I understand completely, been through the same thing when I was getting my Associate's degree, and now back in to school trying to get my bachelor's degree....kids are older now, so that's a huge strain off of it........... Just keep pushing the school, DO NOT QUIT! You will regret it for the rest of your life if you do, and you are so young, you need that to survive in this economy the way it is, you are smart enough to know that it will work out one way or another, even if it's not the path you chose, just know that you have to look out for the best interests of you (and your family) to be able to better provide for ALL of you in the future..............I wish you all the best Daisy, and go kick some butt in school.........lol........talk later girl, Ima save ur email address in my gmail acct. will drop you a line here and there g/f!!! |
#5
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i understand you got to get that degree to better yourself and family.Your hubby eventually will understand that.:computer:
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#6
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Life is defined by how, we as individuals, deal with stress. It seems like you have a lot going on and it appears to have piled up on your plate til it's about to spill over. You might want to sit down and talk to him when it's not a time of stress, like several hours after you both get home. On the other hand if he is skipping out on helping just to get you to quit, there's something else going on. Again I don't know you, so based on what you said, he could feel intimidated by you going back to school, cause it might make him feel inferior (insert reason for feelings here.) Also if you do quit school, you will regret it later. In this economy I can’t stress enough, to get back in school and get a higher degree. Good luck in what decision you make, I’m sure it will all work out in the end. Last edited by PsyChoTk; 07-01-2009 at 07:18 PM. |
#7
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Re: Personal Issues
:male-fighter1:Hey
thanks for sharing first of all. It's not always easy to come out and talk but sometimes it's easier to write. (That's what I do) :) I know first hand that things can be tough sometimes but eventually it will all work itself out. Being away from your significant other can take it's toll but you have to just know that it will blow over. Don't let relationship problems ruin your schooling and future. I don't always or give the right answer but if you ever need to vent please feel free to email me (sent to pm) or call (also pm'ed) :) Us junkies don't like to see our fam struggle so this is what we do to help others out. Hang in there and keep your head up and thins will eventually come together. Much love from the thermus himself Hang in there kiddo :) |
#8
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Re: Personal Issues
Thnx for sharing,
U need to do whats best for yourself and deside what are the best decissions in life.I personaly tought u was a nice member for the site. With a healty look into alot things. I wish u the best in life. grtz:Laie_47: |
#9
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Re: Personal Issues
Sweets, dang, hate to hear about what you got going on.
BTW - have you really talked to him about the school thing? Guys can be kinda weird, he may be not pushing you, supporting you, whatever, because he doesn't want you to feel like he's counting on you to get things done. Men are kinda strange like that sometimes, it's possible. Not saying that it's a bad thing. Plus, he's prolly worried that when you do get your degree, you're gonna make more money than him, or not need him anymore. Not saying to treat him like a child, but you might want to sit down with him and talk about it - like in a restaurant or something, without your son their. Kinda like a date. Just my two cents. Keep your chin up girl, it'll get better. |
#10
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Sseeing as how a member of the opposite sex has the same opinion as me, I feel vendicated. Can't agree more with gadget. That and I'm putting my $27,000 Psychology Degree from UCF to work. |
#11
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Re: Personal Issues
Daisy i send my best wishes to you and your fam and i hope ya'll make it thru what your going thru because i kno trying to do what you need to do and trying to juggle everything else in life can become overwhelming and make you go crazy sometimes. just remember if it gets to be to much.... grab your ears and rub them and say woo-sa....woo-sa. :male-fighter1:
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#12
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Re: Personal Issues
god speed sister......... My girl is doing the same thing...Your mans just gotta understand. what you do is not only for you.But for him and your child. A better life. You know. My girl does it thankfully over the net. Lucky for me.....
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#13
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#14
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Re: Personal Issues
hey daisy
hang in there, sometimes things seem alot overwhelming and happening at once but dont quit. Your husband will come to his senses. You got alot on your plate now so take it one day at a time. Things will work out just have faith. Terri |
#15
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Re: Personal Issues
as a full time student and full time security officer i know exactly what you are going through. it never seems as if there are enough hours in a day even if you only get 4 hours of sleep max. hang in there and stick with school, us guys are hard headed and feel as if we should support our gals and can feel intimidated by a female with more power or higher ranking than us. you will do good and keep it up with school and everythign else... we will always be here for you and you have my number and my email address is you ever need to talk or get something out. take care and get that degree!! :msn-busy:
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#16
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Re: Personal Issues
OK SORRY IM LATE
but hey its never to late to help a friend right??? well hope everything turns out great for you and your family!!! life is hard!!! it has its good time and bad time!! your lucky you have a wonder boy who both his parents love him!!! you all have good health and have a roof over your heads and you have your husban still there!! i mean thing can be worse!! dont get me wrong but you know life is like a roller coaster ride it has its ups an downs!!! im sure such an intelligent and beautiful woman like yourself will get through all this!!! im more than sure your hubby will soon understand that you simply want the best for you and him and your baby boy!!! it may take some time but it will all work out soon!!! hope you get through all this fast!!! best wishes for you and your family hang in there girl!!! stop by simply to say hi!!!:highfive: loves you here and always your family at Wckediden!!! |
#17
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Re: Personal Issues
your man should support you, i supported my wife while she went to school. but i agree have a good talk with him. When and if you guys have time make time for each other, like have a specific day to hang out with eachother
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#18
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Re: Personal Issues
Sorry to here about all this , was wondering why I havent seen you on the boards at night. Just keep your head up and stay in school and get your degree. That most of all will get you where you want to be in life. I will be writing you some emails for sure hope things turn around for you so you will be back here at Wckediden!!!!
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#19
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Re: Personal Issues
It's nice to have people share their personal lives on Wckediden. Makes this place feel like a family and a community rather than just a website to help phone noobs. Hope all goes well Daisy and look forward to seeing your around here.
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#20
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^^^^How I hated those days................... We should start the Wckediden Counseling Corner. Although I don't have my state license yet. I could, however, pass on some guidance. |
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In our socity this has a surten value. Because allthese things are based on what we see hear etc. If we go beond that,u will see this paper has no value what so ever. Because they designed it that way that we think we must have a license to be able to give possitive professional advice. A bouddist monk doesnt have any license. But i can assure u he has alot knowledge. I will not go to far in this because for some this wil look wierd or odd. grtz |
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#23
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I am verry serieus and also real.
Been into psychology and psychopathology for a wile. Then i start searching where a tought comes from. So then we started to examen the brain. Then we see a tought is energy. The brain vibrates at a surten level. These levels have ratings on feelings. So your toughts create your feelings your emotions and your behavior. Alot other people have examend the same thing as me. And they have come to an conclusion. If u want ill send u a document. this might seem philosofic but pretty realistic to me. But then we could come back to the thing... Real truths cannot be said talked about or even be written, they must be lived expirianced and felt. I been talking with people all around the globe about this. They share the same idea grtz |
#24
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Re: Personal Issues
*SIGH* seriously guys & girls :) what would i do without you all...i really cant express what i feel right now..its just not possible...
to read all those comments from each and every one of you supporting me and offering a shoulder to lean on is just overwhelming for me...never in my life have i had this type of support from any of my friends..(i guess i know who my real friends are now)... i want to let you all know that i have read every comment, every pm, every email..and if i havent replied im really truly sorry but time is scarce in my life right now..i will get back to you all asap..and umm well i want to let you all know that i did have a talk with the husband..it was a very quick but serious talk and it turns out he is having some issues of his own.. he never finished college and so now he is feeling a little jealous that i get the chance to. and well im not gonna lie..he also confessed to being a little jealous of me talking to guys in my classes...because as you all know i am a housewife so he was used to me being at home all day with my son...so now that im out half of the day, he feels insecure about himself... :/...but i assured him he has nothing to worry about. ...and well he did however ask me to promise him something..which i told him i would think about.. he asked me to promise him that after i was done with school i would go back to being a housewife and not go out and look for a job :( which like i said i told him to let things fall into place and we'll see where time takes us.. as some of you know..my husband is a district sales representative for pepsi here in laguna hills california..so he can manage both my son & i and our expenses..therefore he doesnt think i need to work... but anyway..sorry its soo long guys..just wanted to give you all a little update on how things are going...we still havent had time to actually sit and talk like we would like to but im working on it :) so yeah im gonna be jumping on here every once in a while so dont miss me too much :) jk..... god bless you all and i hope to talk to you all soon :) much love and respect, Daisy <3 |
#25
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Re: Personal Issues
thanks for the update daisy and glad that you got that talk in and that you are feeling a little better.... take your time in making that decision and give him some time for that talk to sink a little and he will realize it all. take care
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#26
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Re: Personal Issues
Yeah I agree, give it sometime time to sink in and let him sit on it for now. I don't want to get too personal and be in your business it's just not my place. I just am here to give my thoughts and wish you the best. As far as what you mentioned above on your husbands jealousy feelings, that he will have to work on. Trust is #1 in a relationship, next to communication. If you don't have trust, you don't have a relationship, or at least not a comfortable one anyway, lol. I think everyone gets jealous, some more than others. It's not a bad thing to feel jealous when it comes to someone you really care about and love. How you respond to it, however, can be a bad thing. It's not the feeling itself that can be the problem, it's how you act on it usually that becomes the problem. In your situation, he happens to be set in his ways and is used to certain things, so now he is out of his comfort zone. I suppose that can be kinda tough to deal with for both of you. You just have to decide what you want, dig deep and think about it. That's a desicion that isn't right or wrong, but more about what will make you happy. I think either way it goes, trust and jealousy is something he will slowly have to work on and some things he will just have to come to terms with. I mean, it's no different when HE'S out all day and you have to except that and trust him. So it works both ways. Takes compromise on both parts. People that are usually one way about things like that have a guilty concsious so therefor they feel if that's what they do then you must be the same way. I'm not saying that's the case at all, I just know a lot of people that have been and are that way. They do exist I promise, and I had to learn that the hard way if you know what I mean. Well, it sounds like you have a good husband that just is used to you being home and wants to take care of you and likes things the way they are. I can relate to that, because I wish my wife would just let me take care of her and be home when I get there. I completely understand where he is coming from. But I also understand where you are coming from. And part of me is glad my wife doesn't just rely on me and is indpendant because I know if something ever happened to me she would be fine on her own. Everybody eeds there space as well. I'm sure part of you just needs to get out and feel like your doing something productive. Things aren't always as bad as they seem either. He don't know, there may come a day once he's adjusted to you going to school and he will enjoy his alone time while your there. Well I hope you two work things out, keep your head up and stay positive. Sorry for babling on and on about this, I wish you the best and I think you have a good man that loves you and is scared is all. Like you said, just let things take there course. GOOD LUCK GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD BLESS..... Just take it day by day, step by step..
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#27
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Re: Personal Issues
Sweets - Glad to hear y'all at least got to chat about it. Maybe over the holiday weekend y'all might be able to grab some alone time.
There is only one constant thing in life, marriage, or relationships - CHANGE. How he feels now may or may not be how he feels in a few months. Let's face it, just from your pics, you're a hottie. He probably feels a tad justified in worrying that you might find someone to connect with since you will be in classes with folks that share your same interests. He feels that he made it to where he can comfortably support you and yours without a degree and that you really shouldn't need one. Your little bubble should consist of him and your son, that's partially his mode of thinking; in my opinion. He prolly feels like he busts his ass every day at work to provide for you and what you are doing is basically a slap in his face saying that you don't think he's doing a good enough job of supporting you. I'm guessing that you always wanted to go to school and maybe didn't say anything much about it because y'all weren't in the right place for it to happen at the time, baby, new life together and all of that. Remind him that you are still the person that he fell in love with. That you want to better yourself, and that it shouldn't be a bad reflection on him. As a mother of kids that were really close together, sometimes you just want a grown up to listen to you, to validate you as an adult; and not have to change a diaper or clean up a mess for a while. That doesn't mean that you don't love your family, it just means that you can go batty after a while of not having adult communication. He's probably scared of the change, wondering what the future will hold for your family situation when you graduate. Promising him not to go out and look for a job when the time comes isn't a good idea. That's something that will get thrown back in your face later on. Try telling him that you aren't planning on getting a job, but that you would like something in your life that is yours, makes you feel better about yourself, makes you have your own worth as a person. Not as a mother or a wife. Not that you don't love being a mother and a wife, but that you want something of your own. Not something like scraelboriyorkerooking or knitting; something that other people hold as worthwhile. It's a catch-22 situation though. You really shouldn't care what other people think, but you do. I always hated it when someone kind of dismissed me because I was "just a mother" My family comes first, my job comes second. I'm in a unique situation that I have my family at my job, so I get good all the way around. Reminding him that you appreciate all of his hard work and that you would be willing to maybe take on work outside the home so that he could cut back on his hours and go back to school himself might help to push your point along too. Tell him that it's important to you, so you're thinking it might be important to him to get that opportunity. You're a team, you help each other out, look out for each other, watch each other's backs; help each other succeed for the betterment of the family. That's how it should be. Done preaching now, sorry I got long winded. Good luck to you babe, you'll figure it out! After all, you're in college now! LOL - sorry, I couldn't help myself. |
#28
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Re: Personal Issues
ugh you guys hit it right on the nail...every word you guys speak is as if its coming right out of me..you guys captured my thoughts exactly.
and well with that said..the subject is still fresh so it still bugs him a little to talk about it..what i decided to do is just give him time..he will talk to me about it when hes ready..right now we're taking things one day at a time and slowly working towards a solution that we both feel comfortable with. (not that i had a problem with it in the first place) but yeah things are coming together. and well on a side note..im really considering a marriage counseling class...eventhough he thinks we dont need it...i really think getting his feelings out on the table will help me understand a little more...now the only problem is finding the time for it...but we'll see where things go.. god bless all of you and i hope you guys had a wonderfull holiday weekend with your loved ones. much love and respect, Daisy |
#29
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Re: Personal Issues
it sounds like both of you are handling this good. Marriage counseling is a great idea. who knows maybe it would have saved my marriage. But u r right take it one day at a time......
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#30
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Re: Personal Issues
Alright guys and girls :) so instead of crowding up the forum with another thread Im just gonna keep this one going :)...so Ive been having a little more time on my hands..thanks to my family and friends (yes that includes all of you ) i have my life a little more sorted out now so i feel like I can breath again :) ive also been hoppin on here every once in a while and i gotta tell ya..its hard to keep up :lol:...i have about 2000 unread posts :lol:...so just a quick little update...doing a lot better as some of you may know..i am gonna be on here more often and try my best to help out as much as i can :) so with that said..i have some work to do :) love yall!!!!
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#31
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#32
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#33
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GRTZ CYBER WEESJE MODERATOR@Wckediden |
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